..\ 2025-02-20 my peen had a glitch yesterday after having an orgasm it felt like i needed to pee id go to the toilet pee for a sec, it'd stop go back to bed, and i felt like i was holding it in real bad went back and forth for a bit mabye my body was tired or somthing? the glands and stuff got confused or some shit wouldn't fuckin let me pee my peace 2025-02-20

bla bla bla long ramble for someone christian or some shit

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgOZr5OXaEE&t=99s I ask God a question. Who should I be, how should I act. The knowing creature does not respond. It sits there, just looking at me. I don't know who I should be, how I should act. I ask again. I start to wonder what correct answers should be. Become a pastor, become a missionary, read the bible, get baptized? Ignore the pain, ignore the fear, ignore the curiosity. YOU ARE EVIL. hide yourself. Who is saying this. Who is I, who is God. I ask. The knowing creature sits there. I anylize all actions, become obsessed. Did i offend this person? Did I say something wrong? Don't let pain come from your exsistance. Extreme fear of that which I do not understand. Who is I, who is God. To know yourself is to know a moving object. A amorphous material that changes as you look at it. Better not look at it. The mind will freeze. Who is God? The knowing creature sits, it says nothing. Who is talking here? Who is God? The knowing creature speaks. "You are talking to yourself." To be myself. Is to be, to exist. Who am I supposed to be besides what exists. I am me. Don't overthink it. Experience it. If I hurt someone, then something needs to change. Listen. What do you hear? What do you see? Solder droplets on the brown carpet. Pine tree wisps a wisp at night. Behind a wall, people talking. The water boils. A rock shifts. The knowing creature sits there. What exists? Imagination upon reality. Experience upon dreams. Be and do. Don't wait. Exist. The rock killed itself. I'm just messing with you. XD Sisyphus falls down through the ground. bye bye boulder Stars. Naked universe. A crown of peacock feathers, spiked with steal. The crowd laughs. people The tall grass silently cuts through the wind. shimmer Eyes on the ground, the sky. Eyes on Eyes. Oh No. Oh interesting. Face to face. The face falls apart. No, wrong, it stays whole. Who are you. When a human stares at a human what happens? A name falls away. A person comes into place. The knowing creature sits upside down. Over the red setting sun. The Moon at the end of its tail. Wings of coal, the old dead creatures of old, from the old ground, deep within the old of the earth. "you've gotten off topic XD" "Just exist, let God do the rest." What will god do eh? What will "he" make happen eh? Zukuthstra knew more than that. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kf1_mlevSFg

i've stumbled upon a rabbit hole XD poiky poinked 2025-02-19 umbaldi 2025-02-18 guess who's depressed!?! XD Reverb fucking stupid, won't print stupid shipping label. Means i gota do a label another way. Fucking stressed because of job searching. Gota find a way to survive you know. mabye a job with the county? Trail matenece sounds awsome... My eyes hurt. I'm doin fine everythings ok. 2025-01-30 wana know what it is to have a soul?!? LICK THE INSIDE OF YOUR MOUTH. 2025-01-27 Is Everything Conscious? Within Reason #27 makes some sence, trees are probebly consious 2025-01-27 i wonder if its possible to descibe color as a black and white image, pull at the primordial emotional strings of our evolution to be able to teach someone at least an emotional apoximation of colors? like in the case of a color blind person, they only see in grey scale... made a song today, just need to make the conver art and ill have it out :) is 3 minutes no 13 minute long boy this time :(((( im kinding :) 2025-01-25 "don't jude the art before its finished, judge it afterwards" hah! thats a good one. good night. my body feals exsausted. i need to find a place where i can help, my corpse has skills lets put them to use, lets fix this mess. 2025-01-25 https://yoric.github.io/post/coding-for-a-finite-world/ stop scaling up. "This does not mean that you should abandon research projects or art projects or hobbies. But it does mean that you should strongly consider not scaling them up. Sorry, I meant not Zerging them up." zerg meaning using rescorces in a wastful way. "There are a few, rare, ideas that do need to scale. They are going to do so much good that they are going to outweigh the Zerg factor. If you have one, cherish it, feed it, grow it, fight for it, make it real." 2025-01-25 it takes a long time. speaking as a tree speaks. the forest falls apart. the heat becomes too much. burn, a silent burn. a apocolipse, brought on by an mistake 2025-01-23 Peeping through: The magic of peephole lenses ayeo, one sec 2025-01-23 i want to archive the blackness of a dark room find other houses where its dark enclosed spaces that are uncomfortalble because they are suposed to comfortable 2025-01-22 i wonder if the reason doors are scary... do you leave you doors open or closed at night? keep stuff out? what are you keeping out? show your brain there's nothing there? but now you can see the closet. doors haven't exsisted in our evolutionary history for that long. they are unatural. they section space in to rooms. then these rooms can change in side wether you leae a door open or not. scary. thats what i need to add to the game. doors. 2025-01-15 i'm just guna say this to the void because i have weak self confidence. I don't need to listen to your opinion as if it is an attack to my fealings. Its your opinion. I don't need to apologize for making you upset. I don't need to back down from my feeling, it was what i felt, fuck me, fuck you 2025-01-15 pansyphicism thats what its called where all matter contains some part of a universal consiusness https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Panpsychism where consusness is somthing that arises from matter Then there's Experientialism where matter arises from consieusness? thats strange ooo then there's the idea that our brains are not the source of consiousness but a filter in which a human perspective arises its a funel that condeses a universal consiousness into a body its theory inacidemia is non-local consiousness https://youtu.be/As_SiWqC5tc?si=WJyu7kwcw0P5vvh5&t=336 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JNJv-Ebi67I you know what its is, the brain is anentena, with a narrow bandwidth 2025-01-15 by looking for meaning in randomness, you reflect upon new ideas. Extrapolate new ways of asking question, new ways of finding answers. You may find insights that surprise you. The question we ask changes what the answer will be. Mix up the question, a truer tapastery of answers becomes more clear. 2025-01-15 Indigo (Part One) - Metaphysical Prisoners of the Desktop Ted Nelson in Herzog's "Lo and Behold" 2025-01-13 i was trying to think of a device that could resive a internet signal from a radio tower or satelite, for some reson my brain fist thought of the sound 'fo..'. Then the idea of the object. 2025-01-13 i've been doing alot of fantisization about living in a small town, especially redfeather, where there are only a handfull of places to work. It's simple, you just apply to every spot and see what you can get goin'. They're all local small places as well. Here there are so many large corparations, so many buisnesses, i feel stressed and overwhelmed. I don;t know how i'm going to survive. i want to go hiking. my body feels weak. my body feals sad. i want to find somthing that i actualy want to eat. probebly not eating enough. there's a audio desgin place at the university in greley. i want tro go see what people are over there. don't know how to help me comunity. could go help at the comunity kitchen. this is exsusting. 2025-01-08 Dying on The Internet "we are told you don't have time to be creative" "there is no reality that can exsist on the internet" "ecletic sensations" archived logs -> 2024 -> 2023 dreams